An Irishman walks into a bar in Dublin, orders three pints of Guinness and sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn. When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more. The bartender asks him, “You know, a pint goes flat after [...]
A doctor on his morning walk, noticed the old lady above, Sitting on her front step smoking a cigar, so he walked up to her and said, “I couldn’t help but notice how happy you look! What is your secret?” “I smoke ten cigars a day,” she said. “Before I go to bed, I smoke [...]
A drunk walked into a bar crying. One of the other men in the bar asked him what happened.”I did a terrible thing,” sniffed the drunk, “Just a few hours ago I sold my wife to someone for a bottle of Southern Comfort.” “That is awful,” said the other guy, “And now that she is [...]
This is what happened when a Company put up the following memo: OFFICE MEMO: May all members of staff please note that there will only be one drink per person at this year’s Christmas Party. And please bring your own cup! Regards, Management
If you had purchased $1,000.00 of Delta Air Lines stock one year ago you would have $49.00 left. With Enron, you would have had $16.50 left of the original $1,000.00. With WorldCom, you would have had less than $5.00 left. But, if you had purchased $1,000.00 worth of beer one year ago, drank all of [...]
After an international beer conference in London, all the world’s top brewery bosses decide to go out for a beer together. The Chairman of Budweiser says, “I’d like the most refreshing beer in the world, ‘The King Of Beers’: give me a Budweiser.” The bartender takes a bottle from the shelf and opens it for [...]
SYMPTOM: Feet cold and wet. FAULT: Glass being held at incorrect angle. ACTION: Rotate glass so that open end points toward ceiling. SYMPTOM: Feet warm and wet. FAULT: Improper bladder control. ACTION: Stand next to nearest dog, complain about house training. SYMPTOM: Beer unusually pale and tasteless. FAULT: Glass empty. ACTION: Get someone to buy [...]
